Discord Improved My Marriage

After my husband and I started messaging on Discord to coordinate our wedding plans last summer, it slowly became our central hub for organizing and messaging about everything in our lives. We rarely text now, instead we use Discord channels to keep our lives organized, whether we are searching for a house, sending photos to our cat, or planning for a baby.

How Discord works

Anyone who has used workplace messaging apps like Slack for work will be familiar with it. It''s also very easy to get started, even if you are completely new to the idea. Once you download the Discord app to your phone or computer (or open it in a web browser), you need to set up an account and create an invite-only space called a server. DISCORD SERVER You can invite others and create as many channels and chats as you want. By default, the app notifies you of new mentions, but alerts can be more customized than what''s possible with regular text messages. Premium accounts make Discord money, but the free accounts offer more features, such as larger file uploads, better emoticons, and HD video. However, these accounts are great for personal chats that help to run a home.

Channels keep topics and plans organized

Originally, I created a wedding category that had a handful of channels, like #guest-list and #rehearsal-dinner. My then-fiance and me would post reminders to each others to check in with extended relatives for RSVPs, and to save catering information to be used for future tastings.

Once we got into the habit of leaving reminders and notes in Discord, we began to use it for our everyday needs. We added channels like #eats to share our grocery lists and #real estate to post houses we are interested in viewing (and also rate each other''s picks using emoji responses). Before long, we needed fun channels to share photos of our cat and funny memes instead of letting those clog up our phone storage.

Now my husband and I have 34 channels including a whole new set dedicated to pregnancy. We stopped forgetting what to ask the doctor thanks to a channel that we both drop our questions in and review at appointments. We can easily retrieve the latest ultrasound from the channel, and even save the photos so that family members can see it. We also post updates to daycare waiting lists in the #daycare channel. It makes it easy keep track of all our spots.

Search actually works

If you look for messages on an iPhone, the results are a mess. The search function does not have filters and can take a while to find what you are looking for. Discord''s search function is similar to Slack or desktop email. You can search for messages, mentions, time frames, or a specific word or set terms to find the message that you are looking for.

I use the search tool when I''m trying to find something that could fall into more than one channel or happened a little while ago, and I would rather search than scroll. I have begun to add captions and labels to messages other than links or photos in order to make them easier to find later.

It works with multiple platforms: iPhone and Android, as well as computer.

I have an iPhone. I lost the ability to use iMessage seamlessly when I switched from a Mac and a PC during this pandemic. I can share links and info (or memes) with anyone, regardless of which gadget I''m using. I have Discord on both my iPhone and my Mac.

Committing to one another-and to Discord

Discord has allowed me to communicate more in our married life. It also helped me organize the constant communication that my husband and I had always wanted. We suggest new channels to each other when we notice a topic is popping up frequently in #random, and we put in an honest effort to post groceries we need in #eats or our Wordle score in #wordle. Communication should be easy, clear, and in one place. While we used to constantly lose track of important to-dos and bicker over who forgot to make the grocery list, the little things stopped slipping through the cracks. Our relationship has become stronger and more enjoyable thanks to Discord.