I was minding my own business in my wing of the manse, eating lunch with Consuela, my dear wife, when I heard someone enter my part of the residence. The lock had been picked, though how I didn't know, and someone, namely Jill, just walked into my presence. I was very grim at this sight, deeming it a serious breach of my boundaries for her to enter my home without even knocking, but I also knew that something major was up. I had to get to the bottom of it.
"So...I talked to Karen...and I convinced her to start sleeping with you again. She's happy with it, trust me. So...whenever you're ready...I'd like you guys to join us in bed," Jill gave me a bizarre facial expression, stone-cold even, and there was something off about her smile.
It was more like a smirk. My hackles were raised already by Jill's intrusion, but this was out of the blue. I thought back to how uncomfortable Karen had been while letting me "breed" her, even if she didn't protest verbally. Consuela had since persuaded me that Karen had "forced" herself to do that, to go through with it as a kind of "atonement" or sacrifice, but that she had absolutely hated it. Trust a former sex worker to know the signs of fakery, of course. That was part of her job, no less, with clients who didn't excite or arouse her.
No, something about this was very...wrong. Nonetheless, I quickly texted to Consuela that we needed to "find out what's really going on here," to which she replied with a "thumbs up" emoji. We followed Jill all the way to her bedroom, the one that she shared with Karen, and almost instantly, I could tell that her wife was upset. Consuela coughed and shook her head with a very strong "no" and I touched my wife's hand to signal my agreement. There was just...something very, very wrong about this.
"What happened to this just being a cheap way to breed, Jill? Karen...doesn't look too thrilled with this, not at all. Karen, tell me the truth. This isn't your idea, is it? Nor was the 'atonement' phase, for that matter. This was all Jill's doing, wasn't it?" I confronted both of them, with Jill shaking her head in denial and Karen hanging hers very low.
"I...I...lost...the..baby...," Karen confessed now, "and Jill...Jill...wants to make another one. She wants me to get pregnant again...by you...to help...keep you around, I think. None of this was my idea. I never wanted to 'atone' that way in the first place. I fought her long and hard on it, lost, and decided to keep her happy. I was gonna make up for it by some...other way, not that."
"Jill, we talked about this kind of thing. This...this isn't right. It's not healthy. Even you at first drew boundaries about me not fucking Karen. Then you made it sound as if she changed her mind. I thought that her easy acceptance was suspicious and I should have listened to my instincts...and my wife's intuition. Consuela here was a sex worker not long ago. She knows how to tell when a woman's...not into the sex.
"And it made sense, better than that lie that you fed me. I should have known. A lesbian isn't normally going to do such a thing, not even to breed or to 'atone' to a bi or straight man for breaking up his marriage. I should have listened to every warning signal that I got on the subconscious level, but I was so eager to believe you, why I can only guess, maybe a combo of lust for Karen, desire to give you two another baby that you could raise together, and maybe even a little satisfaction of honor or revenge or whatever.
"That doesn't justify what I did...and now it's for naught, anyway. It wasn't atonement on her part. It was a concession on yours...You pimped out your own wife to please your ex-husband. Why, Jill, why? I feel sick, knowing that I eagerly participated in this sham. She's not a fucking cheesecake or strawberry rhubarb pie that you can bake and present to a neighbor as a peace offering or housewarming gift! She's a woman.. She's your WIFE! She was your girlfriend back then when you pushed into this. And now I have to live with knowing that I helped you violate her boundaries, her limits.
"This...is...toxic. This is sick, Jill. Get some help. Both of you. You, for whatever drove you to pimp out your own wife to another man, despite her being a lesbian, for browbeating her into going along by some means of control and manipulation...and you, Karen, for trauma. PTSD. Whatever you need to get past this. Not to mention any grief over losing our baby. Don't ever worry about 'atoning' to me about anything again. You've suffered far worse than any pain you caused me by now...and I had a role in it, although I was duped into it.
"Jill, we're...completely through as lovers. I gave you a second chance. You blew it. You might not have abused me this time, but you abused Karen, your other lover, and you USED ME TO DO IT! I will sign the fucking adoption papers or whatever, as soon as you get help...but if you don't want to get it, give me the baby to raise...if Consuela is willing, that is. Otherwise, well, I recommend an abortion.
"But we can't co-parent together, can't live together...you picked my lock and broke into my wing of the house! You haven't learned to respect people's boundaries, not even now! I was a fool to trust you again...a mix of thinking with my dick and thinking with my nostalgia for whatever good times we might have had. My sentimental side got the better of me. But no more. I'm done with this mess. This is a clusterfuck of the worst possible order!
"I feel sick...I feel dirty...I feel...used. And that pales compared to how Karen must feel right now. Well, Karen, how do you feel? What do you honestly want? Do you want to leave Jill? Do you want marriage counseling? Do you want...monogamy? What is it that you want? It's been far too much about what Jill wants...I think that you should...and must stand up for yourself. Don't let her fucking gaslight you, as she used to do to me. Jill, honey, you really need to fucking work on yourself here and stop pressuring Karen to do things for you that she hates.
"Jill, you once gave me an ultimatum, so here's mine. You can either, one, get an abortion, some kind of professional help, and try to work with Karen on how to resolve your marriage or divorce, two, you can do those same things, let Karen adopt the baby and raise it as yours together, three, sign over custody to me and let Consuela adopt the baby as hers, or four, see me in court, because I will sue for full custody with only supervised visitation rights if you continue this...twisted, unhealthy plan of yours.
"In any case, I no longer feel safe in my own home...and so I'm leaving. Consuela, honey, you coming with me? I don't want to expose our baby to this, either, do you? I'll find another place to stay, but not this one. This is not a healthy, safe, happy home in which to raise a child and start a family together. Not at all. This...is just..plain..wrong," I ranted, truly disturbed and at the point of retching at the thought that I had helped Jill coerce Karen into sex with me.
Karen still wasn't my favorite person alive, but at this point, Jill ranked far worse than her. Karen was clearly desperate to keep the woman that she loved...and everything pointed to her own insecurity, her fear of dying alone. Maybe the trauma had caused the miscarriage. I wouldn't be shocked if it did. Jill had treated her worse than she treated me at this point. I didn't stick it out before...and I wouldn't blame Karen if she left Jill for good, but I suspected that they would stay together for a while yet.
"I...don't want a divorce, Jill, but no more sex with men. Jack's right. I should have stood up for myself a lot sooner than this. I can't...I won't...go through with this. Thank you, Jack, for not doing this to me. And if there's an apology in there for what you did to me already, I accept. Just as I'm sorry for how I treated you at first, getting you kicked out of your own home.
"I'm...an older woman. You know this. I put my health at risk to have a baby at my age, despite reassurances at first that Jill would bear all of the kids herself. It was one little compromise, and then another, and then another, and before I knew it, I was getting fucked by a MAN, a MAN, just to keep her happy. Me, a lesbian, letting a man stick his dick in me!
"I...I was afraid that Jill would leave me for a man...or a younger woman, for that matter. I was afraid to risk...losing her, because I didn't think that I could get a woman like her elsewhere. She was out of my league, a sexy, pretty, young woman...drop-dead gorgeous, even. At first, my fear led me to be jealous and demand that she kick you out...and then I saw that she wasn't over you, I did everything that I could to appease her, to keep her from being mad at me and blame me again, as she did for her losing you," Karen broke down into tears, sobbing and yet also quite pissed-off.
Little tip. An angry ginger can be a real force of nature, if you didn't already know that. It doesn't change just because she's gay. To be honest, if she wasn't a lesbian, Karen could easily seduce me. Red hair, freckles, fair skin...she was a stunning beauty in her own right, mature or not. To her, though, her age translated into homeliness or being unattractive to ladies Jill's age. There was nothing wrong with her looks, but try telling her that. Karen wasn't rail-thin, but she wasn't fat, either. Somehow, that meant to her that she was chubby, another mark against her own confidence.
"Karen...I'm...sorry! I...I really thought...I thought that maybe you'd like it once you tried it! I read somewhere that everyone is bi at some level, and I thought that maybe once you gave it the old college try, you'd enjoy it. I guess..I guess..I was wrong! I dreamed of having my perfect triad together, my fantasy throuple...you, me, and Jack. Sorry, Consuela, but I was sure that you would tire of him or vice versa, in time. Then the three of us would be together...happily. That was my plan...it kinda fell through, didn't it? I was...a fool.
"Tell me, Karen, what do I have to do to make this work between us? I'll do anything...and I do mean...anything to make it work between us! I'm begging you! Please! You're the love of my life. I thought that I had two...I really did, but...not anymore. Not if I was willing to kick Jack out in the first place.
"Sorry, Jack...sorry for...everything. I'll...talk to you later, more about this, once you've moved out and Karen and I have...had a real heart-to-heart chat. But I think that you're right. It's best if you just...leave. This time, I won't shove a gun in your face, but I don't imagine that you even want to stay, from the sound of it. We can't...heal with you still living here, not me, not you, and not Karen. And not Consuela, from the sound of it, either. Sorry, Consuela, for dragging you into this mess, too," Jill apologized to us all.
"Goodbye, Jill. It's best if you leave Consuela and me alone for a while...and work on you and Karen. You really need professional help, and frankly, so do I. I need to find out why I was so willing to go along with this crazy plan. I know why Consuela did. She was falling in love with me and just took what came with the territory. But I think that if she knew how bad it really was, she'd have given me a swift kick in the ass rather than move in with you guys. Am I right, babe?" I turned to my wife.
"Oh, see now, you're wising up, mi corazon. And you're right about all of that. Except one last thing. I owe Karen an apology for not speaking up sooner and louder. For not putting my foot down about the whole sex thing, since it was obvious that she wasn't happy with it. I knew better. I was just loath to rock the boat and I hoped that it would stop and never start again. I told myself that it was like me with clients, but there I had some control. Here, Karen was being bullied into it...she wasn't paid for it, just pressured and nagged and worse.
"So...very sorry for that, Karen. It's terrible to have someone push you into something like that. It was like my Uncle Josue when I first came to America. Same kind of thing. Only later was I a free woman, making her own dates and setting her own rates. It started out with Uncle Josue forcing himself on me as the price of passage...mine and my family's. So, Jill, straighten up and fly right, while this woman is still willing to work on your marriage. Otherwise, she could very well decide to leave and I couldn't blame her if she did. You hurt her...a lot," Consuela insisted as we headed back to my wing to start packing to leave.
This time for good. I didn't honestly care if Karen and Jill worked out. It would be great for them in one sense and be a nice, sentimental, romantic outcome, but to be honest, Jill was a toxic person. I couldn't blame Karen one bit if she chose to leave that kind of abusive manipulator. It wasn't that she was bi. Hell, Consuela was clearly bi. It wasn't that she was poly. So was I. That wasn't the point. Not at all.
The point was that Jill was a toxic, abusive, emotionally manipulative bully who gaslit her partners and used people to get whatever she craved. She needed a lot of psychiatric help and so did Karen, but for different reasons. So did I for being open to this, though I didn't know fully what it entailed. I should have picked up on the signals that Karen gave me that screamed that she didn't really give enthusiastic consent to the sex, but I was blind to that.
I wanted to believe that this was what she pretended it to be. I wanted to believe that she felt so guilty that she would gladly atone by that means. And I wanted my revenge on her, which I got and it became far too costly. It wasn't mostly my fault, but I had my share of blame. No matter what Karen did to me, that didn't justify me being an accessory before or after the fact in Jill's abuse of her. Yeah, I had some guilt of my own now and I had to come clean with someone about it.
One thing that I knew for sure. If someone claiming to be a lesbian offered me sex, I would politely decline...and then find out why. There was no fucking way that she enjoyed what I did to her...and I should have known better. Should have, but didn't. Now that Consuela spoke up, I'd engage her more in reading the true intentions of any possible partners, so as to avoid any more such incidents. My wife had a lot of wisdom on these issues and I would lean a lot more on that in the future. I refused to coerce anyone into sex, even by mistake.
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