Clench & Hold
An Energy Orgasm Meditation Technique
This little instruction manual was written for a dear friend, who I believed would be able to benefit immensely from the techniques and practices contained in these pages. I hope she is able to achieve the highest levels of mental and physical clarity, and that her life is improved by following these instructions.
However, these instructions are not specific to any one person, or even to any particular gender or sex. Energy orgasms are beautiful in that they do not directly involve the genitals, and so can be practiced just as effectively regardless of the equipment any particular person may have. For instance, I am a man (though, I like to think, a very open-minded one), and most of the people who have written on this and similar topics have tended to be women (in my experience). But I followed their instructions and felt the full benefits they describe!
I would, of course, be remiss not to acknowledge Barbara Carrellas, whose writing provided the background, inspiration, and a large portion of the specific details contained in these instructions. What is contained here, though, is my own take on the ideas expressed in her work, combined with various other amazing sex educators and practioners of Tantra and other sexual/spiritual bodies of knowledge.
I hope that you, dear reader, are able to find some form of personal enlightenment and ecstatic pleasure based on these instructions. Feel free to follow them exactly, or modify them, or just take them as vague inspiration for your own ritual. Most importantly: Have fun!
Why Even Do This?
So, you are at least curious about the experience of an energy orgasm, or else you wouldn't have made it this far into reading. These kinds of rituals can be incredibly beneficial, in everything from physical and emotional release to increased self-control to overcoming internal mental blocks which stand in the way of realizing your true, ecstatic self.
Speaking from my own experience, practicing these techniques regularly (maybe a few times a week) has allowed me to develop very strong control over my own arousal and release, get more in-tune with my partner (a beautiful young woman who we will call Clara), and clear my head from intrusive thoughts or hang-ups regarding sex and sexuality. Basically, it helped me become the person I want to be, sexually and emotionally and mentally. Plus, the first time I experienced a true, full-body energy orgasm (having only had the traditional, male, ejactulatory orgasms before and having been envious of Clara for the full-body, trembling orgasms I had seen and helped her experience), it completely changed the way I think of sexual pleasure. Rocked my world. And now, I experience all sorts of pleasure more fully, having opened those pathways in my mind and body.
If you follow these instructions, I have every faith that you, too, will reap the immense and diverse benefits. You will feel happier, more in control of yourself, and more capable of receiving pleasure from yourself, a partner, or whatever else. Your mind will be clearer, and that in and of itself is worth trying this meditation!
As an extra-fun bonus, Clara has been very clear in her appreciation of my changed outlook, increased control, and capacity to "tune in" to her body and what is bringing her pleasure.
If those reasons aren't enough, then maybe this will work: This is the best, most reliable way I know for women to be multi-orgasmic, and the only sure-fire way I know of for men to be. More orgasms are good, no?
I hope you're sufficiently motivated! Before we jump into the "how-to", let's spend some time going over the "how."
How It Works
The "Science" Behind Tantra
To be totally, completely up-front: I have degrees in math and physics from a very reputable university, and am currently a data scientist. That is to say, I fancy myself a man of science. I do not believe in the soul, or in "manifesting energy," or any of that.
However, I do believe in the capacity for the human mind to have staggeringly powerful influence over sensation and physical experience. The placebo effect is extraordinarily real, with study after study confirming its efficacy even when the placebo group KNOWS they are taking a placebo. I don't know if the very real effects of these kinds of practices can be attributed to the placebo effect, but it seems as good an explanation as any.
All that to say: Whether you believe in this kind of spirituality or not, this stuff works. And trust me, you don't need to "truly" believe in the "magic" for it to work. You just need to believe that it will produce a tangible result, and give it a chance. If that means suspending disbelief and really getting into it (like I did), great! If you can't or don't want to go that far, that's fine. Just trust in the placebo effect, or psychosomatic phenomena, or even just think of this all as one giant experiment in cardiovascular tomfoolery mixed with some serious mental exercise. However you get there, all that really matters is that you try it, and it will work.
In the frame of mind of somebody who truly believes in the energy-flow ideas laid out much more artfully by other writers, the idea is basically this:
Create a calm, comfortable, safe space wherein to practice your ritual, free from situations and negative energy. For me, this can be either my bedroom or my living room couch, and I recently tried it in the shower to fascinatingly wonderful results. But to start, make sure you're lying down and comfortable, on your back with your legs out straight and your head resting on a comfy pillow. Soft, calming music is good, as is candle-light. Just some suggestions!
You invite positive energy into your first chakra (a Tantric "energy center" located at the base of your torso, between your genitals and your anus, i.e. at your perineum), channeling it into your body through calm, meditative breathing and focused visualization. While absorbing this positive energy, allow it to push all of your negative energy and intrusive thoughts out.
Repeat this process, replacing tension and negativity with positive energy and happiness and awareness, up through the rest of your chakras, moving one-by-one through the 2nd (located just above your pubic bone and below your navel), 3rd (the solar plexus), 4th (the sternum, level with the heart), 5th (throat), 6th (between your eyebrows), and 7th (the "crown chakra" or top of your head). At the end of this process, your body will be wiped clean of stress, tension, and negative vibes. You will be tingling with positivity and excitement, and supremely aware of your body.
Then, you will focus on this energy, building it up to fever-pitch, and creating a delicious potential in your mind and body. Once you are almost consumed by the energy coursing through you, you will do what the name of this meditation implies.
The "Clench & Hold" is exactly what it sounds like. You clench your entire body, creating an almost-unbearable tension, and hold yourself there ("on the edge" of your energy orgasm). Then, thankfully, you release, letting the energy race through you and causing your entire being to vibrate with ecstasy. This is not "like an orgasm," it well and truly is. Tension melts away, leaving a profound contentment and peace.
The after-care is also incredibly important. After being that vulnerable, even only to yourself, you need to be comforted and welcomed back into the real, physical world. Caring for yourself at this time is absolutely vital, and can elevate the experience from "really fun" to "world-altering" in its profundity.
So that's the magic. I highly recommend, even if you're like me and don't easily buy into that stuff, that you at least convince yourself to believe in this. It makes it more fulfilling, though most of the effects remain either way. On a strictly scientific level, though, this technique is still really cool. Basically, we're going to focus so intensely on our breathing and the movement of our muscles that everything else fades into the background. This is a great time to work through any internal, mental, or emotional blocks you may have re: pleasure. Then, with a completely clear mindset, we build up an incredible tension in our bodies. When that tension is suddenly and consciously released, well, that basically just is what an orgasm is, right? Especially if you focus on your genitals, breasts, or other erogenous zones.
I highly recommend reading this entire thing, and then trying it out. That way, you'll have some idea what you're doing, and can focus on doing it without having to pay attention to reading. With no further ado...
The Buildup, or Psychological Foreplay
First, as mentioned above, you need to create a space wherein you can practice this ritual without interruption. A comfy bed or plush carpet is a great first place to try. Light candles, play calming music, darken the room, really just do your best to create what feels like a mystic, zen temple to you.
Next, I highly suggest undressing. Being fully naked allows you to experience every little movement that much more powerfully. But if that's not your style, just undress to your comfort level. Orr put on a winter coat, if that's what you want! I don't care; nobody else cares. This is about you, and being comfortable. You're in charge of what that means.
Once your surroundings and your wardrobe (or lack thereof) are ready, lit on your back on a soft, yielding, comfortable surface with your head on a pillow. Your legs should stick straight out, and your arms should be by your sides. Be sure to relax into this position, though.
Now you're going to start breathing. Breathe in slowly, gently drawing air into your lungs, and hold the breath in for a few seconds. Then, let it fall out of you. Don't compress your diaphragm to push the air out; just let gravity handle that. While thi is happening, I recommend squeezing your pelvic floor (the muscles that extend as a net from your pubic bone to your sitz bones, and sort of hold your genitals and other lower-torso organs in place). Letting out a gentle moan also feels really nice, though you can wait to do that until you are comfortable. At later points in this stage, you may find yourself wanting to moan more loudly. Go for it! Just do whatever feels right in that regard.
Now, to start the energy flow. The first phase of this is breathing energy into and out of your first chakra. Visualize positive energy (whatever that means to you; I personally try to imagine warmth and that fantastic post-workout muscular tingle) flowing into your perineum when you breathe in, and swirling about when you hold the breath. When you breathe out, imagine that the air falling out of you carries with it whatever thoughts and emotions are causing you distress or negative thoughts. If there is a past trauma or other bad experience, let the air carry the feelings associated with those memories out of you. If you have internalized any negative messages pertaining to sex and sexuality, let your breathe gradually carry those away. In their place, be conscious of the calm, steady, happy energy that you are pulling into yourself.
This is incredibly important: DO THIS UNTIL YOU FEEL LIKE YOU FEEL CALM. Any tension you were holding in that chakra should be gone by the time you move on. Don't rush it, though! The first time I did this meditation, I spent about an hour on this particular part. Be patient; it will pay off tremendously.
Be conscious to also remove the tension in your legs during this phase, as the 1st chakra is the most closely related with them.
Now that your 1st chakra is calm, happy, and hopefully tingling with visualized positivity, it is time to move onto the 2nd chakra. This one is located between your pubic bone and your navel, and is associated with the muscles in that area, as well as your instincts and digestion. Continue, without interruption, the process of cyclic breathing, but now draw the positive energy from your 1st chakra into the 2nd, while again allowing the negative energy to flow out of you and far away. Wait, again, until this entire chakra is calm and positive, almost thrumming with good feelings. Any tension in your abdominal muscles should dissipate while doing this, feeling your lower torso feeling almost completely at-ease. Take as long as you need, though for me this was much faster than the previous phase. Try to visualize the energy moving; it helps!
Then, repeat the process again but to your 3rd chakra, located in your solar plexus. Again, visualize the flowing energy, and continue until your lower chest is devoid of tension.
When the 3 lower chakras are all cleansed of negative energy and you can feel a sort of tingling throughout those parts of your body, it is time for the 4th (or "heart") chakra! This might take a while, like the 1st chakra, because we carry so much tension and emotion in our hearts and lungs. Just keep breathing, and visualize the energy flowing, until your chest feels calm and clear. Your entire torso should now be tension-less and almost vibrating with positive energy. Feel free to take some time to lightly, gently caress yourself, running your fingertips over your skin and feeling the blissful calmness. Keep breathing like you have been, though! This is a good time to pay attention to any lingering tensions, and remove them with focused, deliberate breathing.
When working on the heart chakra, be sure to also focus on removing the tension in your arms, as this is the one most closely connected to those extremities.
Congratulations! Your 4 lower chakras and your entire torso are calm, happy, and energized. Now, it's time to move onto the higher chakras. First up is the 5th chakra, located at the throat. Repeat the same process, continuing your breath and the flow of energy until the tension in your neck melts away and your skin there feels even more sensitive than usual.
Next, do the same thing but for your 6th chakra, located between your eyebrows. This is your "third eye," if you want to get fully into it, and is closely associated with your ability to observe and manipulate energy. Again, go until there is no tension here.
Finally, the 7th or "crown" chakra, located at the top of your head. This is your cosmic connection to All That Is, and visualizing energy moving here honestly just feels so cool if you really get into it! Once this chakra is cleansed and suffused with positivity, your entire body should be calm and full of good feelings.
You should at this point be in a very steady, calm, happy frame of mind. This can take anywhere from 20 minutes to hours and hours, though it will speed up the more times you do it. Take your time, though, and make sure you really feel the results!
Once in this heightened state of body-awareness and calm, it's time to focus on building pleasure. This is where we transition from the deep, content, psychologically-healing part of this meditation to the ecstatic, orgasmic, fun part!
Approaching the Edge
Your body should be optimally primed, now, to experience the heightened pleasure of the Clench & Hold. But first, let's build up the energy to deliciously-intense levels!
With all of the awareness and positive energy you've been building throughout your entire body and mind, it's now time to escalate things to the point where it feels like you're right on the edge of an intense, full-body orgasm because, well, that's why you're trying this!
This stage is pretty simple, but you're going to want to focus very closely on the feelings of what is happening to your body while you do it. The feelings are really cool, so be sure to enjoy that!
What you're going to do is 30 breaths. But this time, instead of calmly breathing and letting the air fall out of you, you're going to forcefully drive the air in and out. Be sure to completely fill and empty your lungs each time. Be mindful of the energy pulsing throughout your entire body, and be sure to still do pelvic floor squeezes on the out-breaths.
When you have finished 30 breaths (taking about a minute or so), your entire body should be pulsing with energy. Feel this, notice it, and pay attention to it. As a final tension-building step, take one huge breathe in and out, accompanied with a powerful contraction of your pelvic floor. Repeat this, paying particular attention to how the muscular tension makes your genitals feel.
Then, take a third huge, deep breath. Be sure to fill your lungs completely. Clench your pelvic floor, your abdominal muscles, your hands, your toes, and basically every muscle in your body. Arch your back, close your eyes, and hold your breath in. Count to 10. Now you're ready for a full-body energy orgasm!
What You All Came Here For
After counting to 10, with your breath held and every muscle in your body tensed, it's time. Release your breath, and all of your muscles.
A few things will happen at once:
Your heart will race, trying to circulate oxygen to make up for your held breath. You may notice your head feeling light, and feel your heartbeat throughout your body.
You will feel a rush of energy throughout your entire body, but especially in your pelvic floor and genital region, because you were clenching those muscles so tightly.
You will almost definitely moan, loudly. This is wonderful! Give into the urge and the feeling. Let it carry you away.
The tension you just built up in your muscles, and especially your genitals, will be gone. Completely gone.
Congratulations! You just experienced an energy orgasm. Woohoo!
Every time I have done this, it has felt incredibly awesome. It is a full-body experience, flooding you with release and pleasure. Ride that wave, and enjoy.
Self-Care As You Come Down
You just came. Sure, if you're a man, you didn't ejaculate. But you don't need to do that for it to be an orgasm! If you're a woman, well... It actually is pretty similar to a good vaginal orgasm, or so I'm told!
What you do now is incredibly important. Throughout this entire process, you have been incredibly vulnerable with yourself. And you just had a really powerful orgasm. So you need some after-care. You need to feel gentle touch, and hear reaffirming words. So touch your body softly. Skim your fingers over yourself, paying close attention to the tingly feeling. Tell yourself how amazing you are, how awesome it was of you to try this, how much you just impressed yourself. Be a considerate lover to yourself. Compliment what you love about yourself, talk about how beautiful that orgasm was, and laugh at the tingles going through your entire body.
Take care of yourself, staying lying on your back for at least 10 more minutes and just appreciating yourself. This was a hard thing to do, and took focus. You deserve some recognition! You are wonderful; make sure you know it.
When you are all calmed down, you should be totally tension-free again, like after a really good lovemaking session. You should feel light, and giddy, and whole.
Once you are back to normal, having gently welcomed yourself back from the heavens, stand slowly and go about your day. But don't forget this feeling! Carry it with you, and smile about it.
Benefits and Uses
Some Ideas for Further Play
Some benefits of this meditation:
Immediate release and physical/emotional happiness
If practiced regularly, a growing sense of power over your own physical and mental state, and an increased awareness of the world and yourself
Just feels so great!
Ways you can incorporate this into your life:
With repeated practice, can be used to resolve a lot of internal blocks and tensions
Feeling horny, but don't want to masturbate in the traditional sense? This can be your release!